Lebewohl et al v. Heart Attack Grill LLC et al

Filing 55

FILING ERROR - WRONG EVENT TYPE SELECTED FROM MENU - MOTION for Summary Judgment. Document filed by Jon Basso, Diet Center LLC(Delaware), Diet Center LLC(Texas). Responses due by 4/16/2012 (Attachments: # 1 Exhibit Exhibit, # 2 Exhibit Exhibit, # 3 Exhibit Exhibit, # 4 Exhibit Exhibit, # 5 Exhibit Exhibit, # 6 Exhibit Exhibit, # 7 Exhibit Exhibit, # 8 Exhibit Exhibit, # 9 Exhibit Exhibit, # 10 Exhibit Exhibit, # 11 Exhibit Exhibit, # 12 Exhibit Exhibit, # 13 Exhibit Exhibit, # 14 Exhibit Exhibit, # 15 Exhibit Exhibit)(Kain, Robert) Modified on 3/27/2012 (db).

Heart Attack Grill Diet Center

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Anyone who undergoes one of our more
evasive procedures receives a free
wheelchair ride to their vehicle.
(Triple or Quadruple Bypass)
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ENTER OUR PHOTOGRAPHY CONTEST AND WIN!

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ENTER OUR PHOTOGRAPHY CONTEST AND WIN!

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CLICK HERE TO DOWNLOAD A POSTER SIZE VERSION OF THE QUADRUPLE BYPASS BURGER

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1 point for every friend you have visit.
1 point for every friend they have visit...
1 point for every friend their friends that
visit...
1 point for every friend their friends that
visit...
... out to seven degrees of separation!
Only 100 points wins you a Free Burger
& Fries!
Create a new account or log into an existing
account below. Be sure to use the same
name that's on your drivers license in order
to claim your free burger and fries.
Variations containing your full name are
ok.
Name:
Pass:
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LOCATION: Just south of the Phoenix Metro area at 6185 W Chandler Blvd.
in Chandler, Arizona. (South-West corner of Kyrene & Chandler) Our hours of
operation are Monday - Saturday 11am - 9pm and Sunday 11am - 4pm.
PHOTOS: Are you a photographer with some great pictures of the Heart
Attack Grill ? Share them on our website and win a free night out for a party
of four!
EMPLOYMENT: Are you looking for a great job in a fun environment that
pays you what you're worth? If so, we'd love to meet you! Click here to learn
about the opportunity.
MEDIA: Would you like to do a story about the "Home of the Double Bypass
Burger "? If so, we'd love to help! We've organized photos and information to
assist you.

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Who can tell the story of the World's most infamous restaurant??
A poet? ... No...........A philosopher? ... No...........A photographer? ... Yes!!
Plain and simple we need your photos and we're willing to go the extra mile in
order to secure them. Email your best shots to [e-mail]. If
we choose to publish the picture online we'll give you an all expense paid, all
you can eat, all you can drink, night out at the Heart Attack Grill for a party
of four. That's right, a party of four carnivores!

We're not just talking about some whimpy Single Bypass procedure, here.
We're talking about ALL your friends can eat and ALL your friends can drink.
A real good old fashioned knock down drag out party that requires four taxi
cab rides home! All that fun in exchange for just one great moment imortalized
on film. That's the rules, so get clicking!!

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Journalists, students, bloggers, and other members of the media are granted
permission to freely use the following photos. All we ask is that you respect
the hard work and talent of the photographers who've put so much of
themselves into capturing the essence of the Heart Attack Grill , by
maintaining the copyright tags and crediting them whenever possible.
www.epsteinstudios.com

www.wpphotos.com

Those producing radio or television programs may download and freely use
our official theme song, Heart Attack Burger, provided they respect the
copyright of the songwriter, Gilbert Bass, and give him credit in the production
wherever possible.

The following is for open distribution:
--------------------------------------------------------------The Heart Attack Grill is a hospital themed restaurant in Chandler Arizona,
which has become internationally famous for embracing and promoting an
unhealthy diet of incredibly large hamburgers. Customers are referred to as
"patients," orders as "prescriptions," and the waitresses as "nurses."
The menu includes the Single Bypass Burger , Double Bypass Burger , Triple
Bypass Burger , and the Quadruple Bypass Burger , ranging from half a pound to
two pounds of beef. Also on the menu are "Flatliner Fries" (cooked in pure
lard), no filter cigarettes, hard liquor, beer, and full sugar coke.

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The menu names imply coronary artery bypass surgery, and refer to the danger of
developing atherosclerosis from the food's high proportion of saturated fat and
excessive caloric content. The Quadruple Bypass Burger has been quoted at
around 8,000 calories!
One the restaurants most celebrated (and widely publicized) gimmicks is the
free wheelchair service provided to those "patients" who successfully finish
the Triple or Quadruple Bypass Burger . Amidst a flurry of photography from
tourist bystanders the "patients" are pushed in a wheelchair out to their cars
by the nurse of their choice.
Founded in December of 2005 by Dr. Jon, a non AMA recognized physician. He has
been glorified as the freedom fighting arch enemy of political correctness by
some, and demonized as a charlatan "nutritional pornographer" by others, Dr.
Jon can be found each day, at the griddle, actually flipping hamburgers in his
white doctor's lab coat and stethoscope.
The restaurant has found itself in a continual state of self defense against
various activist groups and branches of state government. Most notable was a
very public threat closure from the Arizona Attorney General's in late 2006.
The controversy hit a crescendo when Dr. Jon was arrested after having
attempted to open a live fire hose on a group of picketing nurses. Rush
Limbaugh, Geraldo Rivera, and major networks from over sixty countries went
live with the story, in a non-stop media frenzy that lasted for months on end.
A compromise was finally reached when Dr. Jon put a disclaimer on his website
stating, "The use of the word 'nurse' above is only intended as a parody. None
of the women pictured on our website actually have any medical training, nor do
they attempt to provide any real medical services. It should be made clear that
the Heart Attack Grill and all its employees do not offer any therapeutic
treatments".
Despite the obvious animosity between the Heart Attack Grill , and various
Nursing Associations, Dr. Jon has always taken time in each and every
television interview to point out that we are absolutely in the midst of a
severe global nurse shortage. "It's a real crisis!" says Dr. Jon, "Each one of
us has a duty to help. I view my part is to draw attention to the problem by
playing the role of the villain".
One may question whether Dr. Jon's kind words are sincere, considering the
underlying motive that everyone can plainly see... money! No matter which side
of the debate the general public finds itself, one thing is certain, upon
visiting Arizona they all seem to make the pilgrimage for a burger and fries at
what is perhaps the worlds most politically incorrect restaurant!
The future of the restaurant, according to Dr. Jon, lies in its ability to
successfully transition into a diet center. With sights set firmly upon
competing head to head with established weight loss giants such as Jenny Craig
, Nutri-System , and Weight Watchers , he pays little attention to nay saying
critics.
According to Dr. Jon, "The new Heart Attack Grill Diet Centers will offer the
American public something that no other program has ever been able to do... a
diet program that you actually enjoy and can stick with for a lifetime!" He did

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though conveniently fail to mention just how long the "lifetime" of the clients
might be.
Dr. Jon's most recent fitness book, the Heart Attack Grill Diet, which teaches
readers how to "Eat, Drink, and Smoke their way to Better Health", has not been
well received due to its actual advocating of cigarettes, hard liquor, and
fornication with girls of a barely legal age.

----------------------------------------------------------------------Dr. Jon and his Naughty Heart Attack Nurses are available for special events
and other media appearances. You may contact [e-mail]
for further information.
Take note that our trademarks have been registered with the USPTO and are internationally protected
through our filings under the Madrid Protocol. We seek immediate legal recourse against all parties who
fail to use the appropriate registration symbol when mentioning our trademarks in their publications.

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Q: I can't find the phone number anywhere. How do I call HAG?
A: We don't have a phone. Come on down to the Grill and let's talk over a
burger.
-----------------------------

Q: Has anyone ever survived a Quadruple Bypass Burger ?
A: We perform several Quadruple Bypass procedures each day, but only few
people have actually finished the entire burger.
-----------------------------

Q: What the fastest time that anyone has ever eaten a Quadruple Bypass
Burger ?

A: Joey Chestnut devoured the Quadruple Bypass Burger

in only 1 minute

and 47 seconds!
-----------------------------

Q: Why don't you carry diet coke?
A: Next question.
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-----------------------------

Q: I was told that the Heart Attack Grill invented a new dance craze which is
sweeping the nation. Is that true?

A: Yes it is. We call it the "Heart Attack Burger"

-----------------------------

Q: Is Dr. Jon really a doctor?
A: Despite not being recognized by the American Medical Association, Dr.
Jon continually labors in the pursuit of new medical breakthroughs. He urges
all not to ignore the achievements of medical community's maverick fringes.
-----------------------------

Q: Do you franchise?
A: No.
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-----------------------------

Q: What are the all time top ten all time greatest HAG moments?
A: There have been a lot of GREAT moments! Check back next week for the
complete list of shenanigans.
-----------------------------

Q: What really goes on at Sponge Bath Sunday.
A: We can't tell you, but we promise that you'll get squeaky clean!
-----------------------------

Q: How can I find out more about what goes on at the Grill.
A: Join the Angus Club.
-----------------------------

Q: I've been told that Dr. Jon and the Italian male model Fabio are really one
in the same person. Is that true??

A: That's possible, we've never seen them together in the same room.

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